One of the oddities of Re:Hope is the high amount of men who regularly attend, especially single men. It may be the only church in Glasgow with obviously more men than women on any given Sunday. It is not uncommon to hear people joke about our church being “Man Church.” I love it that we are reaching the men of this city, but were someone to ask how we are reaching men I wouldn’t have had a clear answer.
Last weekend, I was browsing a bookshop and came across a book by David Murrow entitled “Why Men Hate Going to Church.” I looked at it and thought to myself this could either be the biggest waste of time and money, or it could help me understand the unique phenomenon happing at our church.
“Why Men Hate Going to Church” turned out to be the most insightful and encouraging book I have read in years pertaining to evaluating church. I think the book contains not only answers on how to begin reaching men, but also how to reach the emerging generation as a whole.
Some good lines include:
“Men fantasize about saving the world against impossible odds. Women fantasize about having a relationship with a wonderful man…. Is the purpose of the Christian life to find a happy relationship with a wonderful man, or is it to save the world against impossible odds?”
“Men regard churchgoing like a prostate exam; it’s something that can save their lives, but it’s so unpleasant and invasive, they put it off.”
“Please, don’t gauge a man’s commitment to Christ by his tears (or lack of them)… some men are genuinely broken by God without ever shedding a tear. Sometimes the Holy Spirit works without Kleenex.”
“If you want your church to attract men, you must put a high priority on developing leaders…”
“Today’s church doesn’t need Greg because it doesn’t need his gifts, in fact masculine gifts often gum up the works of the ministry machine. If only Christianity required risk taking, boldness, aggression, and heroic sacrifice, Greg might find his place in church.”
If you are in some leadership or influence capacity in a church or intend on moving that direction, especially working with the emerging generation, pick this book up. Even if you find yourself effective, read it. I am glad I risked it.
